Mandy Young

Meeting new people, dating and my life

Tue, 15 May 2012 15:45:00 +0000

*Do you find that your medical issues cause trouble in your social life? When you first meet someone does your medical history come up in the first few minutes? -Amanda Moncrief

This wasn't a question that I could just answer in my Ask Away section, I'm going to need a little more room than that for this question :)

Let's start with the last question first. Yes, it does seem when I meet someone new my medical history is one of the first things talked about. If the conversation doesn't start with it, then it's one of the first 5 questions asked. "What happened to your leg?" And since there is no quick answer I try to tell the quick version, which normally leads into more questions and before you know it, it's 30 minutes to an hour later and I've some what covered the last 30 years! Which I'm totally fine with, it's the story that God's given me to tell and I'm happy to share it with all!

Do I believe that my social life is affected by my medical life? Not really. I mean I did miss a lot last year when I was in the hospital for the whole month of December; I missed Christmas parties, concerts and birthday parties, but that happens to anyone when they are sick, mine just happened to be a little bit longer than normal. And I did have to miss out on my senior trip in high school because that was to Mexico and Mandy can't go there unless it's on a cruise ship so that I'm able to eat and drink on board.. But, my parents took me to Disney World instead and honestly I liked that much better! As far as my social life with friends and family go it's really not that big of a deal.

Now dating.....that's a WHOLE other story! Growing up kids are vain and I get it. And even though I never had a boyfriend while I was in school I always had a date to every dance and 8 out of 10 of my friends were guys! But when it came to being someone's girlfriend that was never my role, I was always every guys little sister or the best friend. Which seems to be a role that I've hung on to throughout the years. I have dated guys off and on but my friends call me a runner, I just say God hasn't sent me "the one" He wants me to be with yet. But it is a little more difficult for me to find someone. Just ANY guy is NOT going to do. While I do live a pretty normal life for someone who has an immune problem, there are a lot of other factors that come in to play. My body does work differently than everyone else's and where that doesn't really concern him it could in the future if I got sick. I can't always just go to a hospital here, I have to go to Maryland. Sometimes I have to be pushed in a wheel chair. And it's hard when you start talking to someone that has dealt with "normal" all their life. When I start talking about what I've been through they can sometimes get overwhelmed. And that's totally understandable, but that was my life then and it's not like that now. But they don't know that and they don't get it.

But to me its like you kinda know what you're getting yourself into. Sometimes people get married and then their partner gets a disease that you never saw coming. That's when some marriages become stronger and some fall apart. You know which ones were set on steady foundation, or there for vain reasons or maybe the stress just got the best of both. This way with me you already know what you're getting yourself into, no surprises, haha!

Now going off the vain thing. I get it, I walk on crutches and have an entire leg missing. I'm not the "normal" girl. And as much as we would all like to say that we aren't vain to some degree we ALL are, some just more than others. But I told my sister a while ago and completely believe it that God did me a favor. If I had two legs yes there might be guys that would be interested in me but they aren't because I only have one leg and you see this is where the favor comes in. I don't want those jerks in my life anyway! If they are going to judge me before they know me based off of a leg, I don't need them now and I sure don't need them later. If they are judgemental like that in the beginning just about appearance then can you imagine what all they are going to be picky about later? I don't need the stress or the drama. So God's already weeded out a whole group of guys that I don't even have to bother myself with. I feel sorry for you other girls (and guys, because girls are just as bad) who have to find out the hard way.

And this is where something like internet dating is hard for me. Do I post on my page that I'm an amputee? I don't want to be judged too soon. But I don't want anyone to think I'm hiding it either. This is a conversation that a friend of mine and I were having not too long ago. He has MS and doesn't know whether to post it on his page. His case and mine are different because he could date someone for a while and still hide his disease, I on the other hand can't hide my missing leg and the questions that follow. So what do we do? Let's say I haven't posted it on my page, I get an email from a guy and we start going back and forth and then at some point I have to tell him. Which really stinks for me because you never know which way it's going to get taken and you know that if you've been talking and then all the sudden communication stops you know why! But let's say that I have posted it on my page and I start communicating with a guy and then they want to know why. So they are cool with it and then I have to tell them why. They might be able to take the leg thing but then the package of why I lost it has become over whelming. They weren't expecting to find out all that they did and they aren't looking to get into all that. Again I get it. I've said it time and time again, my life is not one that most would choose to live, but its not one that I would change a day of. And if dating is difficult because of that, then so be it.

I honestly think I could write a book about all of this but maybe this is where I need to stop for now and it will prompt more questions to answer. All I know is when I do find Mr. Mandy Young (haha) he will be totally worth the wait. I'm not willing to settle and God doesn't want me to either. He'll accept me for who I am and the way God made me and love me all the more because of it.

What Would You Do?

Wed, 18 Apr 2012 02:55:00 +0000

Do you ever watch the TV show, "What Would You Do?" It's a great program that puts undercover actors in certain situations and then waits to see how the public will react. For instance, if there is a person in need or someone is getting picked on, will someone go to their aid? After watching it, I sometimes go out in public, see a situation arise and wonder if I'm on the show! But it really makes you want to step up, which is honestly what we should be doing anyway! Its a great show, so if you haven't watched it, you should!

I had to go out of town this week and as I got to the airport I thought, I want to go on that show and see how many people would see me in an airport and offer to help me! And then it happened! As I got out of the car, I had my purse on my shoulder, computer bag on my other shoulder and was pulling my rolling duffel (yes this is a true story!) all while walking on my crutches. And this nice guy sitting on an outside bench smoking, jumped up and said "let me help you with your bag!" I said, "No, no that's so sweet, but I've got it" and he said "are you sure?" I giggled and with a smile said, "I'm fine, I promise, but, thank you!" and his reply was "You're a soldier, seriously you are, you're a soldier!" I just laughed and went on my merry way. I checked in at the desk and actually got a wheelchair to take me to my gate (normally I'm not all about the whole wheelchair thing but I gave in. I have a lot going on in the next couple of weeks and I don't want to ruin my underarms). So, we get to the B concourse and it's craziness - packed. I'm dropped off at my gate and instead of sitting in the chair I got up and wanted to walk around. I'm a "stander" by nature anyway but I was thinking I'm about to sit on a plane for two hours I don't want to sit now too. So I got up and walked around and propped myself up on a post. A guy walks over to me and asks if I want his seat. I told him that was sweet, however I wanted to stand for now but thank you! That was very 'southern gentleman' of him to ask! Then I got a text from a friend who happens to be a pilot who happened to be at the airport and wanted to run over to my gate for a quick hug and hello before he had to take off. So I walked away from my 'post' and stepped away from the crowd so he could find me easier. While waiting for him, a pilot who was waiting for the same flight I was, came up to me and asked if he could get me a wheelchair. I told him, "no thank you, I'm fine I want to stand" and he said, "well I'm at least going to get you one to take down to the plane." I said, "no, no it's okay I'll walk" and he said, "how are you going to do that?" I said, "I'm use to it, it's okay, I promise!" About that time, my friend got there and pilot to pilot they started talking about me. The one I don't know starts explaining to my friend that he was trying to help me and before he could even finish my friend said, "she's not going to take your help, she's stubborn." And well, I can't argue with that! My flight started boarding, we said our goodbyes, I walked down the bridge and right before I hit the door of the plane, I see Mr. Pilot. He said, " well, you did make it down" and I jokingly said, " yeah I made it but geez I thought you were going to at least carry my bag!" He grabbed the handle of my luggage and said, "hand it over!" I said, "no, no I was just kidding! I'm fine! I promise, I was just kidding!" He said, "Ma'am you know that you can get in a lot of trouble if you fight with an airline employee, right?" So through my giggles, I handed over my bag and he helped me load AND unload from the plane. He even got my crutches from the front closet and brought them to me when we landed! Such a nice guy! I assured him once off the plane that I could handle my bag but thanked him again and again. Once up the ramp, a lady stopped and asked if she could help me. I thanked her but told her I was fine! It was so nice and gave me such a good feeling how many people offered to help me!

Later I thought, man that was so nice that all of those people tried to help me today! But then I thought about how many people were in both airports, how many people I passed and how many people I really walked by. And even though I would have probably told them no, out of thousands of people, only 4 offered to help me. It's crazy when you think about it that way. Again it makes my heart smile to think about the 4 people that offered, trying to help their fellow man. But what about all the other people that are so consumed in their lives that they can't lend out a helping hand? And while walking through the terminal that's when "What Would You Do" popped in my head again. I thought this should totally be on their show!

Now I'm not saying you need to bombard every handicapped person to offer them help. But you know, if you see someone struggling or looks like they need help, just ask them! Even if they say no at least you have asked and done your good deed for the day! Help those who need a helping hand! We have to stop being so self consumed and bee lining to where we need to go. Take your time and look around and lend a helping hand! You never know if John Quiñones will come around a corner and ask, "so why didn't you help?"

My Crazy Little Life

Fri, 30 Mar 2012 14:25:00 +0000

I will admit I am not a hot weather person, it's more like bring on the cold for me! Although I will admit that I miss pool hang outs, sun dresses and most of all my tan! And even though Winter is ending ( I don't really even think we had a Winter this year) and Spring is popping up (although In GA you don't really even get a Spring, we basically have two seasons, Summer and a tiiiiiny bit of Winter) I'm trying to hype myself up for summer. And with Spring comes my crazy little life. For some reason my calendar seems to get jammed packed when Spring rolls around. I guess it's that coming out of hibernation mode.

Right now I'm pretty much working 3 to 4 jobs, which that right there keeps me busy enough. During the day I put on my receptionist hat. I've been working at my office for 11 years now (which is crazy to think that I'm old enough to have been out of high school and working somewhere for that long already). Throughout my day I also work for Roo Magazine! Roo is an online magazine that was started by one of my friends Candace Cameron Bure! Ladies if you haven't checked it out yet, you need to! I am the Social Media Manager for Roo, which basically means I tweet and facebook for them! I read through the articles, give you a little sneak peek, tell you about giveaways, introduce you to the contributors and anything and everything else that's going on there. www.roomag.com Job #3 is traveling with Candace! This is one of my favorites! Candace travels around to churches and women's conferences and shares her testimony. I love watching her use her celebrity to spread Gods message. When you come and hear her speak it's not a bunch of Full House or Make it or Break it talk, it's walking you through her faith and her walk and I promise you if it doesn't make you realize things you are doing wrong then you aren't even listening to her! I love watching her touch the lives of people that come and hear her speak and I also love watching people interact with her! When she's on the road I'm kind of like a personal assistant. Anything and everything she needs I try to handle for her, I'm there to be her support and her friend, to sell her products (she has t-shirts, a book, autographed pictures, and CDs of her testimony...if you'd like any of this visit her website www.candacecameronbure.net ), and anything else that might come up in the meantime. If she's ever speaking around you, you need to come!!

And last but not least I'm a speaker! This is my newest passion for life! Years ago I had been ask to do a little speaking and I did it but pretty much against my will. I hated it and after I would speak somewhere I would look at my mom and tell her never again. Then I started traveling with Candace (this was about 6 or 7 years ago) and I would sit there and listen to her and other speakers and one day it was like God just pushed me out of my chair and said "Mandy why are you not doing this for me? I have given you a story that no one else has, I've let you live through all of that, I've given you a personality where you've never met a stranger and a mouth that never shuts up! Why are you not using it for me?!?!" That weekend I talked to Candace about it and started on my way. My attitude about speaking is completely different then it was. Before I was doing it for me or for other people. But now I'm doing it for HIM! It has meaning, it has purpose,and it's what I'm supposed to do. It's funny how much I love it now! When you are in the middle of God's will it just feels right! I'm just beginning and I already have so many ideas. I can't wait to see where God puts me and uses me.

So yes right now my life is a little crazy, I mean those are just my jobs that doesn't even include my family or social life! But I love it this way. I leave in the morning to head to my first job and then normally don't get home until around 10 or 11pm get ready for bed and do it all again the next day. I love this life that God has given me the honor to live and I am happy to do whatever He wants with it! So Spring I already know you're going to be jammed packed, but I'm ready for you! Let's do this!

Aunt Pandy

Thu, 22 Mar 2012 19:05:00 +0000

So if you're friends with me on Facebook or if you follow me on Twitter you already know but I'M AN AUNT!!!! Oh my goodness I am so in love!! Saturday March 17th, 2012 at 4:27am I became Aunt Pandy to the most beautiful little girl named Charlee Crawford! And yes that's right she is a St. Patrick's Day baby! I believe St.Patty's day is now my 2nd favorite holiday (Christmas being my first because of another baby's birth)!

My poor sister went through 32 hours of labor but was a complete trooper! My brother in law was amazing! The waiting room was a hoot!! My Mom, Dad, Mamaw, Papaw, my two aunts (Cheryl & Leslie), my cousin (Sam), Chad's Mom (Dee), and his two sisters (Kim&Tiffany) were all in the waiting room for the arrival of sweet Charlee!

I knew that I was going to love Charlee but I had no idea how much I could love her! I feel like she is my own and since I don't really plan on having kids I'm just going to pretend like she is mine hehe :) I will keep you updated on her but I just wanted to share my news!!! All the time God is good, God is good all the time!!!

4G weekend!

Wed, 14 Mar 2012 03:20:00 +0000

What an awesome conference God allowed me to be apart of this weekend! I got to speak for the 4G Girls Weekend Retreat (in Taccoa,GA) which is apart of Go Tell Ministries! This weekend is for girls 6th grade to seniors in college! Yes it's a wide range of ages, but it's so wonderful and fun!!

We started the weekend off with Awaken, a girls worship group who are all students at Liberty University! They were great! They had the girls on their feet, singing loud with hands raised! Then I was blessed to get to be the opening speaker! I gave my testimony to the girls in hopes to inspire them the next time that they are going through troubles and to help them realize that our lives are not about us but about HIM and HIS plan for us. After prayer the girls split up into their break out groups. This is where they are now split up by ages to feel comfortable with their own age peers and are lead by an older leader to go over what they just learned and if the girls had any questions they could be answered.

After break out sessions we all ran back to our rooms and changed in to our pj's for the "Sweet Dreams" slumber party! Once changed we headed back to the common area and had our GIANT slumber party! They had music, games and of course every ones favorite junk food!!! Let me just tell you about the food! There was a candy bar! A popcorn station with different toppings (I chose hot chocolate)! A huge cupcake tower! A brownie bar! And of course you're going to get thirsty after eating all of this so there was a hot chocolate bar! Yes it was a sugar high party!! The girls played twister, then a little getting to know you game with Awaken and then line danced their little hearts out! It was a blast! The party was over by 11 so we could get back to our rooms for actual sweet dreams and then start back up the next morning!

Saturday morning we sang with Awaken and then Monica Rose started us in our morning session. She was teaching on purity, not only sexual purity but also the purity for our eyes and ears! She did a wonderful job and the girls loved it! Then we headed to our "White Out" brunch! Everyone dressed in white that morning to symbolize purity. It was awesome seeing the sea of white and how many girls committed to staying pure before they are married! And after our yummy brunch it was back to break out sessions and I was able to sit in with the college girls and talk to them. Then it was back to the Chapel for more fun and giveaways!! The girls were giggling and smiling from ear to ear during this time! It was so awesome to see. Then it was time for our last break out session and pizza party! During this break out session I sat in with the leaders (If these ladies wouldn't have been so awesome to bring them these girls wouldn't have gotten to come) and I just opened the floor for questions and it was great! Then back to the Chapel for our last session with Awaken and our closing speaker Danielle Newsome! She did a whole thing about teenagers in the Bible and what we can learn from them, it was awesome! And then as each girl left the conference they were given a white flower to take home! So sweet!

This has been a dream of mine, to speak at a conference and God let me do that! It was so awesome! Honestly when I started speaking I didn't see myself speaking to youth but the more God opens that door for me and points me to it the more my heart grows for it. It wasn't that I don't love youth, I do....I just didn't think that they would understand the medicinal side of my life and be able to relate to what I'm saying; but they do! It was an awesome weekend and I hope I get the honor of doing more of. Not only are these girls getting to worship God together but they are getting to learn about His word, meet new Christian friends, play games and do fun things that honor God. Some people believe that when you follow Gods law there are too many rules and rules=no fun.....oh but that is so not true! The life that God wants you to live is filled with so much more joy than you could ever imagine, and joy and fun go hand and hand.

*Picutre: With the Mr&Mrs Gage of Go Tell Ministries*

Ding Dong the Stent is GONE!

Fri, 24 Feb 2012 05:10:00 +0000

Well it's been two months since all of this started (but feels like 7) and it seems to be coming to a close. Today I was able to have the stent removed! The OR had to fit me in and since they weren't shooting any dyes or taking x-rays while they were in I wasn't put to sleep! I had been freaking out about that part of it since yesterday. I was rolled in to the OR moved myself on to the table and talking to everybody. One of my doctors who has been so precious during this whole thing told me he knew how nervous I was about getting it taken out but not being put to sleep so he was going to stay at my head and talk to me. Then right as they began to start he said, do you wanna hold my hand and I did! So sweet and it really did help. The whole procedure took about 20 seconds to go in and pull it out, so that was awesome. I was then rolled back to recovery where I was given a shot of antibiotics in my bum! Honestly I didn't even feel it, I feel the soreness from it now but not then. Got dressed, went up to Phlebotomy to have my blood drawn (first stick, yay. Yesterday was two), picked up my meds from the pharmacy, rescheduled our plane tickets and that was all before 10 am! I'm now back at the hotel. We will be here until Sunday so that I can be under observation just to make sure my body doesn't want to get to crazy. I just have to go over to the hospital once a day and have my blood drawn. So happy to have that over with!

I forgot to tell you my favorite parts about yesterday. While waiting in phlebotomy yesterday there was this little girl and her mother waiting for their turn to be called back. I had just sat down and all the sudden I hear a little voice ask "What happened to your leg?" I look up and the little girl is standing in front of me asking the age old question. I tried to explain that my leg had gotten really sick with an infection and that the doctors had to take it off. She then asked like so many kids do "Did it hurt? How did they do it?" I told her that they had put me to sleep so I'm really not sure. And since I was asleep it didn't hurt. After talking to her and her mom I found out that this was the little 9 year olds first visit to the NIH and she was scared of the needles. Her number was called back and she was gone. Soon after my number was called and I went in the little cubey but looking across the way was this little girl. Once she was done filling all of here little vials she headed over to my cube to watch me have mine done. She was the sweetest little girl and I was explaining to her about how shots only hurt for a second but how much they actually help. As they headed to their next appointment the mom just looked at me with a smile on her face and whispered Thank You. But it was my pleasure!! Oh and right before she left me in the waiting room she reached in to her little bag, walked over to me and said I have a sticker for you. I looked down at the conversation heart sticker that in red letters just says "SMILE" This little girl made my heart smile.

Later on while checking in with Urology and waiting to be called back the nurse for their department started talking to me about her husband who had just lost his foot. He was dealing with the amputation pretty well and won't let it get the best of him down. We had a nice little conversation that went every where from balance, God and movies! I love when paths cross :)

Then while getting on the shuttle to go back to the hotel today and yesterday when I got in Christian music was playing. Yes I know it sounds silly but it was like God confirming in a small way that he was with me. I know he is , but it was like a sign. I mean h-el-l-o I go to a Government run hospital there is very little Christian anything going on in those walls. You know besides the miracles that are being worked inside everyday coming through those doctors :)

So all and all it's been a good trip!

Kissin the Stent Good-bye!

Thu, 23 Feb 2012 03:40:00 +0000

YAY tomorrow is stent removal day!!! I have been waiting for this for over two months. I know that doesn't seem too long exspecially in the medicial world but believe me I've played this waiting game for so many things so many times but I'm ready for this one to be over.

Removal will be at 7:30 am! I'm a little nervous because they aren't putting me to sleep to take out the stent!! Yes you read that right. They act as though it isn't that big of a deal just taking it out. But I dont like the thought of being awake, I wanted at least to be twilighted or something! I have been told that it only takes about 5 mins to do the whole thing.

I was originally supposed to get to come home Friday but they want to keep me for a few days and have my blood drawn daily just to make sure that everything is healing okay once the stent is out! I get to come back to the hotel and stay with mom instead of being admitted into the hosptial which is nice. I'll either be home Saturday or Sunday, we aren't sure yet. I'll stay on my antibotics for 4 weeks and then come back up in 2 months for a check up! I think I can handle that!

So please pray for my nerves to be calm and for a safe healthy removal of the stent!

My Valentine's Tradition

Thu, 16 Feb 2012 19:35:00 +0000

Growing up I had it in my head that if you're single you're supposed to hate Valentines Day. That's how all the grown up girls acted, so I felt like I was supposed to do the same. But honestly deep inside I didn't hate it, I liked it. It could be my 4th favorite holiday (1.Christmas 2. Thanksgiving 3. My Birthday). Boy or no boy I liked this holiday filled with hearts. Now I will confess that I do believe that Hallmark has totally blown this holiday up to be way bigger of an idea than it really is but I wish a new spin would get spun on it!

So here is the history on Valentine's Day....The original "St. Valentine" was just a lithurgical celebration of one or more early Christian saint named Valentinus .All the modern romantic connotations were added several centuries later by poets. Several martyrdom stories were invented for the various Valentines that belonged to 14th February, and added to later martyrologies.This celebration was deleted from the General Roman Calendar of saints in 1969 by Pope Paul VI. The day first became associated with romantic love in the circle of Geoffrey Chaucer in the High Middle Ages ,when the tradition of courtly love flourished. By the 15th century, it had evolved into an occasion in which lovers expressed their love for each other by presenting flowers, offering confectionery ,and sending greeting cards (known as "valentines"). *Thank you Wikipedia! So even though we call this a Hallmark made up holiday, it's really not. Although I'm sure they had a hand in to making it a bigger deal than it originally was.

But to me why does this day have to be about that ONE someone?? Do you not love more than one person in your life? I mean there are 4 about to be 5 that mean more than me in my life. I cry at that thought of how much I love them. Yes it's my family. And I'm sure if I were seriously dating someone but for sure if I were married that guy would be in that same category with my family. But it doesn't mean that I'm going to start over looking my family come Valentine's Day because some people get the idea that it's just a couples holiday. So anyway years ago (before my discovery that I really didn't hate V-day) I started a tradition of dinner out with my single friends. It started off as an anti-Valentine's day/ anti-love dinner. But now I realize it's not anti love because I'm not an anti-love person. I love people and I love love. But I'm also the kind of girl that isn't going to settle and I'm pretty independent, so if I'm not with someone that's okay (which I know isn't a normal girl attitude). I know I'm better off being single for the right reasons than to be with someone for the wrong reasons (like being lonely). Now my little group has changed from year to year but I love this little tradition. I love my friends almost as much as I love my family so what better way to spend Valentine's Day!

On Valentine's Day this year at work as a co-worker walked in to our office I greeted them by saying "Kisses, Happy Valentine's Day" and would hand them 2 Hershey kisses! I love being able to do little surprises like that. Then this year Morgane, Blair, Mariette and I went to dinner and a movie. Still traditional Valentine's day activities just more people going than two. And yes this year was just girls but we have had single boys join us on this yearly tradition before. We started at Chili's for a lovely dinner where I gave each girl a box of chocolates and a card. In the card I thanked them for being my Valentine and how blessed I was to have each one of them in my life. After stuffing ourselves we headed to the movies to see This Is War. Super cute romantic comedy. I believe we all agreed that Reese is one of our favorite actresses and that we're gonna have to buy the movie once it comes out (even if we do go and see it again while it's still on at the theaters). Our next little adventure took us to Wal-Mart...I was on a mission for a project for work and my lovely dates wouldn't let me shop by myself since it was so late at night and didn't want to take the chances of me getting kidnapped, haha, aren't they too sweet!

See to me Valentine's Day isn't supposed to be about sharing and showing you love to just one person. While if you are in a relationship and even married yes you should show love to that person (but also you should be telling that person every day NOT just one day a year) that shouldn't be the only person. Show and tell everyone how much you love them and do this all the time. But if you are a single girl on Valentine's day, don't fret there are tons of girls single on Valentine's Day. Find some girls and put together your own little fun night or come and join mine! We need to stop focusing that this holiday is based off of loving one person after all we are supposed to love ALL. I'll put a "religious" spin on it. God tells us to love all. "This is my command:Love each other"-John 15:17 And in John 14:15 He tells us that if we love Him we will keep his commands....which goes back to the last verse I wrote! "And now these three remain:faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love" 1 Corinthians 13 and in Matthew 19:19 "love your neighbor as yourself" He tells us to love others as much as we love ourselves. And living in the self centered world that we live in these days we should be loving our fellow people a WHOLE lot, haha! If you search love in the Bible you'll come up with a TON of verses because like these verses tell us it is His greatest command and love is the greatest. It doesn't tell us to just love one but love all! And I'm not going to change that just for a holiday.

Happy Love Month!

Fri, 03 Feb 2012 21:45:00 +0000

HAPPY FEBRUARY!!!! What do you think of when you think of this month? For me it's Valentine's Day, the color red and hearts. Hence why it's also Heart Association month! And even though Valentines day is pretty much just a holiday made up by Hallmark I love it. And being a single girl you would think I would hate it, most single girls do anyway. But it's not a holiday just based on love for your spouse, boyfriend, girlfriend or person you're dating. It's about LOVE....is that the only person that you love in your life? If it is, I feel pretty sorry for you. My love isn't just meant for one person, it's to be shared with the world!

I've given myself a little task for February as far as Facebook is concerned. I will write a status everyday for this month but they have to do with love. Then I started thinking what about taking it a step farther and sharing bible verses on love! I'm three days in and I'm loving it! So far I have used....

*FEB 1-"We love because He first loved us" 1 John 4:19

*FEB 2-"This is my command: Love each other" John 15:17

*FEB 3-"If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them....But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High,because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful,just as your Father is merciful" Luke 6:32-36

The verse for today only helps prove my point (but even takes it another step). What I was saying earlier, God didn't make us to love one person. He tells us to love each other! But then todays verse tells us to not only love each other but to love our enemies. It's easy to love those who love us but the true test is to love someone who isn't so in to us, or doesn't like us or even hates us. Do you know how hard it is to love someone you don't even know. Or maybe it's even harder to love a person that is mean to you or has hurt you in some way. Do you see in this passage it tells us that we have to love our enemies and give without expecting anything in return....weather that be doing something nice, a thank you, or even giving love and not receiving it back. I think this is one of the hardest things we are supposed to do. We wanted to be recognized for the good things that we do but God even tells us that that's not what love is about. True love is being able to love ALL, friend or enemy. God isn't a judge of our actions, He is a judge of our hearts. So even though we may say we love someone He can tell by our hearts if we are telling the truth. He asks us to show the same respect and grace that gives to us.

So from February until forever I'm gonna love like Jesus. Love all....it is His greatest commandment.

My Heavy Heart

Sat, 28 Jan 2012 05:50:00 +0000

I've had such a heavy heart today. Yesterday some friends of mine's brother was hit by a car while on his morning jog. The last 24 hours have been more than a roller coaster ride of emotions. He is a husband, a father, son and brother, coach and I'm sure so much more. At 3:30 pm this afternoon this world lost this 33 year old man. I never had the pleasure of meeting him but I know his siblings and I know how much I love them so I'm sure I would have loved him just the same. My heart has been torn apart all day just thinking about what this family is going through and I can't even imagine. I have felt an actual pain in my heart that aches for them.

Not long after I got this news I saw where a friend that I've known since high school changed her status to say "12 years...", I immediately wrote her back and just told her I loved her. Even though I have this date written in a calendar I hadn't kept up with it lately and hadn't noticed that this date held a empty space in my heart. 12 years ago today (my senior year in high school) some freshman girls were in a car accident. One of them was my favorite little freshman in the world, Kristen Wayne. She was the cutest, most bubbly person I knew. And her amazing love for Christ at such a young age baffled me. I actually ate lunch with her the day she was killed. I remember her beautiful smile and how all the boys loved her. I was the only teenager that she was allowed to ride in a car with. So after school every day Kristen, Alex and I would load up in my car and head to softball practice. A couple of months before she died I remember her telling me about this boy she was "dating" (if you can even call it dating in 9th grade, they can't drive yet, but hey whatever). He was the cutest boy in all the freshman class and even though I tried to talk to him at school I swear that boy would ignored me (I was trying to help his social status, haha). And she introduced me to this boy that she was dating named Chad Crawford. She and Chad had split up months before the accident but I thank her for introducing me to my now brother in law. But she's the reason I knew who he was when Chad and Alex started "talking" (dating lingo). Kristen was one of the most beautiful people that I have had the pleasure of meeting and being able to call my friend. Oh how I miss that angel and I can't wait to see her in Heaven one day! I bet she's even prettier with wings and a halo.

It's no wonder that I had a heavy heart today. There is heart ache in this day. Two people were taken from this earth way too soon! But this is when I have to remind myself of God's perfect plan. Right now (or when you're in the middle of the storm) while in the middle of tragedy it's hard to understand why God does the things He does. Why do people have to die that we feel shouldn't? As my friends say, "if we understood everything that God does then He wouldn't have a reason to be praised." It's so hard to see the big picture, because we're consumed with our lives but we are actually just a TINY piece of God's puzzle. I don't know why this happened today or 12 years ago, but I have to believe that there is a reason. God has reasons and He doesn't have to explain them to us. It's kind of like our Earthly parents telling us "Because I said so". We just have to accept it and trust that it's right. As mortal humans we are selfish beings and want to keep what is ours (like our family and friends) but that is not going to happen. Plus nothing is really ours, everything is His and He can take what is His anytime He wants. But with acceptance of Jesus in our hearts and living like Him for our Father we are promised to see these loved ones again. God holds true to all of His promises and this is one of the ones I'm most happy about. Instead of being selfish we should be jealous. They are in a much better place than we are; and we will see them again.

Please keep the Ingram/Payne family in your prayers. This is going to be a rough journey ahead, especially for his 2 young children. And if you would please say a prayer for the Wayne family as well. Yes, Kristen died 12 years ago but they have to relive it every year if not every day forever and forever. I'm praying for all that are hurting and in pain. I pray for peace, understanding and for them to cling closer to Him than they have ever done before.